Growth - What is it?
Growth is defined as “the process of growing” - okay, so what does that mean? So I checked out the definition of “growing,” which was defined as “of, relating to, or being in the period during which something grows or matures.” Don’t we love when something is defined with the word itself? It took a few layers to get down to the base - but at the core it is maturing, to gain in size. Plants mature and gain in size, so that they can be all that their potential allows. They take in sun and water (what they need to grow) so that they can mature.
I can appreciate that as a society we are trying to change our wording such as ‘weaknesses to growth areas.’ Just as I would encourage a client, I want them to notice both what they are already good at and areas that they continue learning or to grow in. If we approach ourselves as having weaknesses or “lesser” parts of ourselves, there is more space for disappointment, guilt, and embarrassment. Of course, we are not good at everything, nor do I expect individuals to be great in all areas. I do ask my clients to be aware of areas that are challenging for them that they can continue to mature, to grow.
If you are sitting with me in session, I guarantee we have discussed awareness. This is something that I find essential for growth or change to take place. Awareness is the practice of slowing down, of noticing what our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors are. This is not judging or changing what is occurring. This is simply taking note. When we can pay attention and have this insight that says, “Oh I see the way that I am acting and how it is connecting to these other areas of my life.” Naturally, as we give more attention to our present state we will begin to notice what is going well and what is not. When we notice what is not going well, this is like big arrows pointing to a sign that says “THIS IS MY GROWTH AREA.”
Once we have identified what our growth areas are that will help us make goals, plans for treatment, and create a collaborative approach moving forward.
Some questions we may ask ourselves in moments of checking-in are:
“How does my body feel at this moment?” - think physical symptoms and sensations (hot, sweaty, cold, shaky, itchy, pressure on chest, tension in muscles or jaw, facial expression)
“Am I having any specific thoughts surrounding this experience?” (ex: ‘Johnny makes me so mad’ ‘I am always targeted in these situations’ ‘Nothing goes my way’)
“Can I identify how I feel at this moment?” (Angry, sad, anxious, happy, joyful, grief, etc.)
At the end of the day, I encourage everyone to create the life that they are happy and proud to be living. This may mean that we need to make changes to go in a direction that fits our goals and needs better. I also want you to remember, growth does not end. We are able to continuously be working on parts of ourselves at the same time as feeling satisfaction and contentment in our current state.
I named my business Cultivate Together Counseling or in other words ‘To nurture and to help grow’ together counseling. I have always seen people as something dynamic. We are not stationary or something that cannot move or change. I want to work with you to help create change. I hope to help you activate the skills you need to create growth in your life. I will help create a safe space, a place for you to feel seen and heard, a space where you can begin to explore and practice awareness so that you can do that outside of session as well.
